Halloween is my least favorite holiday.
I don’t think it even qualifies as a holiday in the true sense of the word. Now, there’s nothing wrong with kids dressing up and roaming the neighborhood in search of free candy.
However, grown-ups dressing up and wandering around in public makes me incredibly uncomfortable.
Even as a kid I felt unsettled when I’d encounter an adult dressed as Batman, Robin or even a “sexy” she-vampire.
It just creeps me out. So, the very idea of needing to dress up makes me squirm. But I think this year may be different.
I have a teenage daughter who has been obsessed with the musical Hamilton for what feels like years, but in reality, started this summer.
If she isn’t listening to the soundtrack and enthusiastically singing along – she knows every word – then she is muttering lyrics under her breath like a Hamilton-loving Rain Man.
This has exasperated the family for months on end.
She works a Hamilton reference into every conversation – like a Canadian who cannot help but blurt “they’re Canadian!” whenever anyone mentions a celebrity who hails from the Great White North.
In her spare time, she is either answering or writing Hamilton “quizzes” on Quotev.
This is somewhat of a sore subject in our house as her Quotev quizzes have been known to get more hits than many of the articles and reviews we post on flipflopdaily.com. Seriously?
So, when it came time for me to start thinking about Halloween, Hamilton was on my mind – for better or worse.
Being the very generous and supportive father that I am, I first offered this as a suggestion for her costume but she was adamantly and violently uninterested.
But I think I’m really onto something here.
Imagine someone dressed in an aristocratic Colonial American suit complete with frilly white shirt, black wool topcoat, formal silky white collar with a hand knotted bow-tie – the works.
Exactly like what Alexander Hamilton is wearing in his portrait on the ten dollar bill.
But, instead of Hamilton’s face, imagine the face of a camel above the collar, with a perfectly coiffed white head of hair like Hamilton.
That’s right, my costume idea is to go as Alexander Camelton. Brilliant.
My other idea is to go as Aaron Bird (a riff on Aaron Burr).
Same idea as Camelton but with a bird’s head instead of a Camel’s.
Interestingly, the Chicago zoo named a new-born baby camel Alexander Camelton. I learned about this after I’d shared my Halloween costume idea. A sign that I’m onto something huge to be sure.
The part I’m struggling with as the date approaches are which flip flops to wear?
I wonder, is this even a flip flop-appropriate costume? It’d be a slam dunk if I were to go as a Julius Caesar or even a toga-wearing Greek Philosopher.
But Alexander Camelton, man, this is a flip flop life challenge.
Finding a Colonial American flip flop ain’t easy. By combining A. Ham with A. Cam it is possible since both the flip flop and the camel each work well in sand.
To help settle this, let’s walk through the Flip Flop Daily flip flop checklist:
Occasion: Taking the kids trick-or-treating in our neighborhood. Possible forced work Halloween party function.
Fit: I’ll need a very reliable fit given all of the distractions that come with wearing a costume and interacting with others in costume. I can’t afford a costume malfunction and have my flip flop fly off mid-stride. Must be snug.
Style: With this in mind I’ve designed my costume to have felt galoshes of sorts that mimic camel feet. They fit around my ankles and drape down over my shoes. So, since my flip flops won’t be visible style really won’t matter. This is a point in my favor.
Traction: Since I’ll be taking the kids door to door I’ll need solid street-wise footwear. It’s 50/50 as to whether it’ll rain or not so I’ll need a very solid and multi-surface ready flip flop.
Comfort: I get a free pass here since my flip flops won’t be visible so I’m free to max out comfort. Excellent.
Dudeness: Given the fact that I’ll be dressed as Alexander Camelton and wearing flip flops my Dudeness score will be through the roof.
After working through the impressive list of reviews on flipflopdaily.com, one contender stands out above all the others.
Comfort and traction reign supreme here and I need not worry about the styling since no one will see them! It’s like wearing your favorite tattered undershirt beneath your tuxedo to the wedding.
Only you know and the comfort is amazing.
Well, now that that’s settled I need to head out and get the finishing touches for my one of a kind Alexander Camelton costume.
I’ll need some frilly lace and a camel head mask. Man, this is brilliant.
Now I just need to convince my wife to go as Aaron Bird. Happy Halloween!